Excerpt from my past: Chains


I was once a slave,
Forced to live for another’s cause.
I no longer am a slave,
But I’m still not free, I just wear different chains.

They arduously trained me,
Forced me to change all that I once believed,
Even my thoughts were not my own.
They remade me.

“Don’t raise your voice.”
“Don’t look them in the eye.” Continue reading “Excerpt from my past: Chains”


My ever-evolving existence

So if you actually follow this blog you may have thought that I fell off the face of the earth…. I didn’t, by the way, I just lost my voice.

In the past 5 years I’ve fallen in love, lost and found friends and pounds, and even met a few flying pigs. My story is changing and so am I but life doesn’t stop to let you catch your breath or grow accustomed to the new you before everything is changing again.

So who am I now? Continue reading “My ever-evolving existence”

House Rules

51MCHP948VLOk so my most recent obsession is one Christian Kane. He TOTALLY rocks! He’s an actor in Leverage on TNT. He is an amazing actor but he’s also a professional singer (my all time favorite song is Whiskey in Mind – seriously? Check him out!), B.A.B.S. and I had the pleasure of being able to see him live one fateful Thursday night. We met a girl in the bathroom and ended up partying backstage but we’ll get to that story later, all I’m gonna say about that is that he’s a really cool guy!

Anyway, he has a song titled House Rules in which one line quotes, ‘Rule number 7 says don’t touch the ladies but they can grab whatever they want to’ and that got B.A.B.S and I thinking about what our house rules would be… You should know that we don’t actually live together – she lives with Win-Win and I’m more like a permanent visitor – what can I say? I’m a professional couch surfer!

So, Vixen and I got together to give them a nice housewarming present: a bottle of champagne, two poster boards, a sharpie and couple hours later….This is what we have: Continue reading “House Rules”

Did a tele-marketer just ask me out?


So… You know how annoying tele-marketers are? How they always call right around dinnertime and keep you on the line just ‘cause they can? Well here’s a recounting of the conversation I had with one last night…

T: I’m calling to let you know about Wyndham Vacation Resorts preferred customer program yada yada yada river walk blah blah blah San Antonio…

Me: Let me stop you right there, I don’t know who you’re trying to call but I’ve never stayed at a Wyndham hotel anywhere. Continue reading “Did a tele-marketer just ask me out?”

Meet the Characters

4298177937_e2c8d93725In any story about my life, my girl B.A.B.S. will feature very prominently! She and I are two peas in a pod! We’re one of a kind! (wait… never mind) We have always inspired each other to greater levels of insanity and without her I would most likely be a very boring, lonely person, with an invisible cat (no really, her name was Tilly)! So, how did I meet such a person? I’m glad you asked!

I was born in 1986 deep in the jungles of Papua New Guinea, to two missionaries who were very much in love. But, that’s not what this story is about. I was born in a doctors office becuase there was no room for me in the… hospital (what did you think I was gonna say?) And because of the time change between there and Texas (where the rest of my family lived) my grandparents were able to proudly call up their friends and tell them all about their beautiful granddaughter born 6 lbs, 8 oz at 8.50 am… tomorrow morning.

When I was three I crawled into the monkey cage at the zoo and my parents have since confided in me that they’ve never been quite certain that they got back the right baby! Continue reading “Meet the Characters”

Hello world!

Glad you found your way here!  Put up your feet, make yourself comfortable and hold on tight ’cause this is gonna be one hell of a ride!

My name’s Perky (we’ll get to the origin of that later)! You’ve probably met me before (I was the one with a big old bruise on her arm from a run in with a display case) you might have even had shots with me (Tequila anyone?) All I know is that adventure seems to follow me around and trouble is always right around the corner. I’m clumsy and wild with amazing friends and boy, do we have stories to tell!! That’s why I decided to start a blog.

Well, if I were to be honest… Continue reading “Hello world!”